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Tuesday, June 30, 2009

First Post! WOW!

My name is Lauren and this is my blog. It would be nice if I could write an interesting introduction of myself but I won't! I'll just dive right on in.

I think I'm pregnant! eee! I had a miscarriage last October so I am feeling skeptical. Last time around, I had a sense something wasn't right...sure enough, it wasn't. This time, I do feel better about it. I am CRAZY up and down, extremely tired (although, am I making that up?), among other symptoms...if this actually works, I am very early on...about 4-5 weeks. I made an appointment with a new OB/GYN whose name I got from a friend. My last doctor shut down their Fairfax office and I'm not driving out to Reston! They want to see me when I am 8-9 weeks so the appointment is set for July 16th. I think at that point, if I'm still pregnant, I'll feel more confident. I'm starting to brainstorm baby names and what will we do about storage! agh! I am not very good at keeping secrets so don't plan to really keep this a secret until I am through my 1st the same time, I definitely won't tell my employer (for as long as possible actually), and won't shout it from the mountain tops just yet. But I'll post it on this blog! HAHA! I dont think anyone I know can find this blog so it will be okay.

I'm trying not to sensor my posts...I want it to be interesting! This is impossible for me b/c naturally I think things like...What if I ever need a top secret security clearance and the fact I have a blog causes them to deny me! These are the types of thoughts that go through my head.

Lately I have been thinking a lot about how who you spend time with is kind of, who you are! That's not a very good way to say it. What I mean is, if you hang out with a bunch of extremely conservative people, you may end up being extremely conservative. I AM very conservative and I tend to be pretty reserved and a very rigid thinker as well. I am a black and white, all or nothing thinker. And of course, I tend to be drawn to people like this. OC's UNITE! (Obsessive Compulsives UNITE!) But I believe it's important to spend time with all types of people...maybe I need to spend some time with friends who when they talk I think, "WOAH, I can't believe they just said that!!!" Because I need to losen up just a little :) I strive to get to the point where I can not only listen to this fun talk without turning red and giggling...but where I can actually chime in! :) How freeing to not worry about what people will think! For any of my OCD friends and for any of my friends who also turn red and giggle when they happen in on a conversation like this...I also want to spend more time with you :) BUT---for anyone out there, and there are some, who really CANNOT talk about what is on their mind, in fear of ruffeling a feather...come on!!! That's boring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm in the middle of a job transition. I haven't told my current employer. Since I sell mortgages, I won't get paid unless I am employed when the loan funds. I need to wait until my last loan funds before giving notice...HOPEFULLY (Crossing Fingers!!!), I can give my notice by July 13th!Praying. I will start work with the government starting July 20th. Now this will be a completely different world and definitely slower than what I do now...But I would like something less stressful. Can't wait to have my weekends off!

I want this blog to be a place where I can dump my random ruminations! Enjoy.