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Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Someone walked in on me...

*I meant to post this on June 10*
I cannot BELIEVE it is June 10, 2010!!! Where DOES the time go? Jack’s four month doctors appointment is on June 22. I wish I could say we’ve only been to the doctors for his two day, 1 week, 2 week, 2 month, and 4 month doctors appointment. NO! NOT the case! Between Jack and Bailey (refer back to my previous post on Bailey), we are at the doctor all the time! I hope Jack isn’t like Bailey…I just shuddered as I wrote that. For Jack we’ve been to the doctors office numerous times…reflux, ear infection, URINARY TRACT INFECTION/KIDNEY INFECTION. UgH!!! But hopefully we’re in the clear now.

Work is going fantastic as I mentioned in my prior post. I feel engaged, love the people, love the agency, love what the future may hold. I have a conference in August. It’s only once every two years and I feel I need to go, although I know no one is forcing me to. I have been debating it for a long time now…so this week I finally bit the bullet and registered. Six whole days away from my little family. I will have to pump every night for 48 nights so that I have enough milk to last Jack the entire time I’m gone, assuming I pump 5 ounces each night. I hate pumping! When I’m there, I’ll have to pump as often as Jack would normally eat and then store it…I requested a fridge in the room and will send the milk back using dry ice. I could probably just dump it and not bring it back with me but I hate pumping and wouldn’t want to waste the milk! Last night as I was falling asleep I sort of got an anxiety attack thinking, what if Jack starts preferring the bottle while I’m gone since he’ll go six whole days without nursing? Ugh. That would be a horrible thing. I cherish that time I have with him. I don’t feel like people understand b/c when I mention it, people say, “He’ll be six months.” I know you can stop breastfeeding then but I want to breastfeed for a full year. OR I start worrying, what if he DOESN’T start preferring the bottle and has a really hard time not having that time with ME while I’m gone? John is REALLY great with Jack and Jack loves being with John but still, I’m the mom! So I guess when I’m awake I feel like, okay I can do this. But as the day starts winding down and I become tired, my mind starts whirring and I get a LOT of anxiety about this trip. On the other hand, it’s going to be a blast. We’re going to Denver and there is a lot to do there! I’ll be able to socialize at night, watch movies in my hotel room, and sleep in past 5:00 AM! Heavennnnnnn!!!!!
Akward moment of the day: Someone walking in on me while I was pumping. I thought I was the only one with a key to this “employee file room” but apparently not. When I heard the key turning, I yelled “someone’s in here!” Luckily it was a woman but when she saw me, she just continued on in and started filing things around me. Akward! I spilled milk all over my pants and somehow had a big wet mark on my butt. And only produced like half as much milk.

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