Being a mom is hard!

Ughhhh.  I have to blog when I am having a little motherhood crisis!

This sleep thing is just killer!!!  Jack is a A+ sleeper at night but an F- sleeper during the day.  Since Friday (so almost a week) I've been working with him on naps.  I know he is still too young to have a routine per say...but he definitely still needs naps.  I know I can't be so rigid as to say...at 10:00 AM and 2:00 PM he will sleep for two hours every day.  But I can watch for his sleep cues and when I see him  get tired, put him in his crib for a nap.  He hates it!  He hates sleeping in his crib when its light outside (his nursery is dark but not AS dark as night).

I feel like I know my kid and I'm doing what I have to do for him and I'm doing what works for him...which like I've mentioned in previous posts, involves crying.  But I can't help but feel like a bad mom!  Every doctor will say something different.  My doctors tend to say to let the baby cry, teach them how to sleep now, it will only get harder and they need sleep...it produces happier baby, happier parents and the baby is developmentally better off.  My friends doctor told her not to let them cry it out until they're over four months.  And then there is the question...how long do you let the baby cry it out for!

I think us moms need to go with what our instinct tells us...b/c I think it must be different for every baby and for every parent!  But its so hard not to question myself...and wonder if I'm really damaging my baby and if he'll stop trusting me, etc.

Last Friday was day one of me trying to teach Jack to take a nap.  The naps were not long but I'd say he slept in his crib for a total of an hour that day.  Well that night, John got home, and Jack actually LAUGHED and smiled with John for a good 10 or 15 minutes...that never happens!  Jack is usually too irritable (probably from lack of sleep).  So I thought, I MUST be doing the right thing...he is happy!  But 6 days later, I still want to cry when I start to wonder what I'm doing?  I just hope I'm not doing anything that will harm him later. 

I can't believe he will be 2 months old on Tuesday!  Time flies.